• Thibodeaux was fishing one day when he had a heart attack and died. The next day Thibodeaux's wife, Ada, placed the obituary in the Crowley, Louisiana newpaper that read, "Thibodeaux done died!" The newspaper called Ada and explained that she could add some details since the obituary could be 10 lines long. She corrected the ad and the next day it ran stating, "Thibodeaux done died! Boat for sale!"

• Tee-Boy was playing with some sticks behind his house when he noticed that the outhouse was leaning over towards the bayou. Being the curious little boy that he was, Tee-Boy got the idea to kick the outhouse really hard. He reared back, gave it the biggest kick that he could, and suddenly that outhouse tipped all the way over and fell into the bayou. Within seconds, the outhouse sank to the bottom of the bayou, and Tee-Boy ran to hide in case if anyone was watching. Later than day, Tee-Boy's papa approached him and asked if Tee-Boy knew anything about the outhouse. Tee-Boy looked at him and replied, "Papa, just like George Washington, I can not tell a lie. I kicked that outhouse as hard as I could, and the thing sunk straight to the bottom of the bayou." Tee-Boy's papa gave him a stern look and said, "You are going to get it boy! Go and fetch me a good stick out the tree!" Shocked, Tee-Boy asked, "But Papa, George Washington didn't get into trouble when he told the truth, so why are you going to whip me?" His papa explained, "When George Washington chopped down that cherry tree, his papa wasn't in that tree either!"

• Boudreaux was lying on his death bed. The doctor had already told him that he surely wouldn't live for another week. Suddenly, and much to Boudreaux's glee, a wonderful aroma hit Boudreaux like a tidal wave. He knew that the smell meant only one thing- his wife had just made a pot of gumbo. Boudreaux wanted a bowl so badly, but he was no longer able to walk, so he crawled out of his bed and into the kitchen. Just as Boudreaux was reaching for the pot, his wife barked out, "Boudreaux! Shame on you! You know that gumbo is going to be for the funeral."

• Thibodeaux was driving down the road one day when he saw a beautiful woman standing in the middle of it. Thibodeaux hit the brakes and aksed the woman, "What's wrong Miss?" The lady explained, "My life is over. Nobody cares about me. I want it all to end, so I'm just praying that someone will run over me on this road." Thibodeaux begged her, "No Miss. Please don't do that. You are beautiful, obviously smart, and you have a full life ahead of you. I'll tell you what. Jump in my truck and I will sneak you onto the boat I am working on. We are heading to France, so you can hide during the journey and we will slip off together in Europe and live a wonderful life." The lady agreed, and Thibodeaux snuck her onto the boat as promised. For over three weeks, he fed her three meals a day, brought her water, and romanced her in the life boat after the crew went to bed. Eventually, the captain of the ship caught the lady and asked her, "Miss, why are you hiding down in that cabin?" The lady explained, "I'm so sorry. One of your crew, Thibodeaux, has been hiding me here, feeding me, and romancing me at night on this whole journey to France." The captian giggled and told her, "No, no. We're not on our way to France. This is just the Chalmette ferry!"

• Boudreaux was driving down the levee one evening when he saw a cop pulling up on him with this lights on. Boudreaux pulled over, stepped out of his truck, and asked the cop what was wrong. The cope explained, "Boudreaux, you were doing 75 down this levee, and you know the speed limit is just 40!" Boudreaux told the cop that he was wrong, and asked his wife, Marie, to tell the cop that he wasn't speeding. Marie told the cop, "Sir. I can not tell you if my husband was speeding or not. I have learned to never talk about him when he's been drinking like this."

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, blue, yellow. The old man just stared.

The young man said sarcastically, "What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life?"

Without batting an eye, the old man replied, "Got drunk once and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son."

Jeff

www.pensacolapetdoors.com

 'You're just not in touch with m y emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.' 
 
She respond ed to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me for 
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?' 
 
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. 

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with 
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big 
unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on 
several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to 
take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to 
compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.' 
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of 
diamond 
earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I 
was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me 
because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. 
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She was 
almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling 
with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's 
go to the cashier.' 
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel 
like it.' 
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 
'WHAT?' 
I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. 
You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.' 
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, 
'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?'  
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least she knows I'm smarter than her.

16' Wellcraft (Tammy II)

 Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something.